Joyce Wilson

45 y/o

Super Mom

Newark, NJ

What is the greatest thing about being a woman?

Our resilience. Our will to endure whatever comes. Our love. The inward woman that's inside. That whole spirit of the women. She can be that awesome friend, lover, mother, auntie. Just everything.

What are some challenges of being a woman in today's society?

Sometimes it's hard when women have to truly be everything. We don't have to be everything, but society forces us to be everything. And then your critiqued and criticized for not being everything. For example, if I am somebody out there making the bacon and I still have to look pretty and I still have to uphold to your idea of pretty. I find it hard for people to see the pretty inside of you. Like you didn't see that I gave 100 through the storm?!? To me, that's pretty. But to have people see something other than what they can visually see its hard.
Also, sometimes women have to pull their kahunas out. Maybe in the workplace and you're also parenting and struggling, you have to look to something and say "ehh you can't cry right now". But at the same time you're criticized like "oh now you're a dude". Its like which line do we stand on. It's just hard for us to have it all. At the end of the day we're all pink. We all want somebody to understand that I'm strong but when I want to vulnerable, I want to be vulnerable. Is society ok with that? Like are you ok if I want to have a crying session for a week? Is that ok? Is ok for me to see a psychologist or psychiatrist to say "hey, I might not be ok"? I think society accepts men for who they are, but they don't accept women for who they are.

Who or what inspires you? Why?

God is always my guiding force. My son. And then who I am on the inside. imp big on that because I think who I am on the inside is overshadowed a lot. I'm around a lot of high profile women, friends and family. Nothing about them fascinates me. It's always "let me find out more about the real you". I don't care about the brand of your bag. I think what inspires me is what God is saying to my soul, my spirit, my son and just who I am. Outside people don't inspire me. It's really what God is saying to me about my walk, my journey. There was a time when other people would inspire me, like Oprah. But at this phase of my life, no one inspires me but God.

Finish this statement, "If I knew then what I know now..."

If I knew then what I know now I would know that it's ok to deviate from what you've learned growing up. My parents did what they could do and it's ok for me to have a different journey. I don't have to carry my childhood into my adulthood and it is ok to be different than what you knew. When your in a urban community and there are people who think a certain way, it's ok to be that person in the corner saying "I don't think that I wanna fight over this". When I was younger I didn't know these things. I thought it was ok for me to fight and to think that the drug dealer in town was the person to be with. It's ok for me to think that maybe I want somebody with a job or a career. When you're around people who think it's hard to be that person who thinks opposite, you're fighting against what you know. But it's ok. It's ok to be different from what you knew growing up. It's ok to challenge that thinking.

Describe a day in the life of Joyce.

A day in the life of me is always about making myself better. How can I be a better person today. When I wake in the morning the first thing I do (which happens to be a 2016 resolution) is make sure that the first five minutes of my day is spent with God. Just asking him what is it that he wants for me today. Then my day just starts. I'm working. I'm always thinking and planning for my son; talking to him, making sure he's good. It a day filled with making sure I'm ok for the day. A lot of meditation and self observation.

Now if you had a super power, what would it be?

To open up wine without the corkscrew (laughs) I would love to have the power to see people without having to have time invested. I want to know who you are from the gate versus me having to spend a minute getting to know you. I don't like to find out people later. But g'wan. (laughs)

Name your awkwardly cool trait (something about you that most people don't know).

I have a sexy side to me. When I'm at home I like to play in makeup and stuff and take pictures. But I never post them or anything. It just kinda brings out that little Scorpio in me without bringing it. So that's my whole secret side. Just getting into myself with myself.

Describe your fashion sense?

(laughs) That's hilarious! I have none. I have absolutely none. My fashion sense is "comfort ability". And you know what, I find that it offends other people more than me. My friends may suggest something and I'm like "no, you know I don't like coats. Why I have to get something because you like it". I don't know. I just like to be comfortable.

Name three things you never leave home without.

My pocketbook, my cellphone... I don't know. I don't always have money so. (laughs) Pocketbook and cell phone. Like what else would I need? A wildcard; whatever that may be that day.

If you had theme music for every time you entered a room, what would it be?

Probably "I'm Every Woman". (starts singing) Yup.

Name one place you would love to travel to.

Bayonne (laughs) Italy. It's some good ass wine there. Italy for real. Everybody drunk (laughs)

What's your relationship status?

Happily single by choice right now; got out of a situation that wasn't complimenting who I am.

Finish this statement, "I feel sexy when..."

I feel sexy when I am in tuned with who I am. When I'm very comfortable and there is no façade. When I'm comfortable with all the flaws, I'm just like "bring it". I'm sexy (smiles)

What is your dream job or career?

An Urban Psychologist. Understanding the urban psyche and the thinking, why it is, what's to be changed and how to change it. Just understanding that dynamic of living in an urban community and how it alters your thinking.

What are your goal for 2016?

To finish up school, which is going to take a while. To just complete my projects. That's it. Don't talk about it, be about it. Nike sign. Just do it. That's it. Nobody want to hear what you gona do, what you plan to do or what you in the process of doing. People want to hear that it's done.

Finish this statement, "It's all about ME because..."

It's all about me because I'm worth it. (smiles) I've earned. I'm worth it. When my son was younger, no it wasn't all about me but now it is. I'm worth it. That's all I can say.

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